oh, wow!

our daughter jessica and grandson jay came to visit last weekend for mother's day. one afternoon after jay went down for a nap the girls went out shopping (imagine that!) and i stayed home with jay. he woke up not feeling well and just cried for his momma but momma wasn't home. so i walked around with him in my arms trying to substitute something for his need for his momma. nothing seemed to change things as he continued to cry. but as we were walking by a wreath on the front door, jay spots an artificial butterfly and all of a sudden without a hint of tears he exclaims "oh, wow!" and he is amazed at the beautiful butterfly. it has taken all of his focus from wanting his momma to sheer beauty. i think that is why Jesus says we must be like little children - to be able to find the beauty of God when all of our focus is on ourselves. oh, wow! - how i love the way this little guy teaches me new things. last night at journey team we talked about the ways we see God in our everyday lives. mostly we see Him through the nature that only He can create - the birds that sing, the flowers that bloom, the beauty of sunrise and sunset. some see Him through the melody of our favorite songs. i think those ways are our opportunity to become childlike and marvel at His creation. the deal is that we don't stop enough to smell His roses - to feel the wind upon our face. "be still and know that I am God", psalm 46:10.

invisible

i was struck by an article in the augusta chronicle yesterday - an associated press story about a 72 year old woman found dead in her home 18 months after she died. this happened in a small community between columbia and charleston, south carolina. come on - 18 months and nobody cared or knew her enough to check on her? wow - how lonely could that have been? how did she slip through the cracks? one of the paragraphs stated that the authorities didn't think she attended church - you think? while i don't say that church is the answer to everything, it is a place for true community - true love for one another or it should be. church is where everyone should know your name - know if you are not there and care enough to go find out why you are missing. i feel so bad for her and the people that lived near her - near enough to look in on her every now and then. and her car sat in front of the house - never moved - for a year and a half and nobody noticed. so what does this have to do with you and me? do you/i know your/my neighbors? are we in touch with them enough for them to know if you/i died or they did? i think it is easy to just forget about the elderly. they don't mean so much any more do they? one of the hardest things ever is to visit an assisted living or nursing home. seeing people - really shells of people. but they are still people. the really scarry thing is that might be us one day - lonely people.
if you care to read this story, here is a link;
http://www.besternews.com/related/Yahoo!%20News:%20U.S.%20News/Reclusive%20woman%27s%20death%20sobers%20small%20SC%20community%20%20%20%20%20%20(AP)/?ref=national|MOUNTAIN-VIEW+CA+US

touch

last night our journey team members laid hands on me in prayer as i prepare for the trip to haiti. it was a powerful and moving experience. i have been a part of laying on hands before but it had been a while. it kinda freaks some out but i think it is a great way to share God's love for others. i shared with the group last night how i had begun to feel some fear about the trip tuesday after being informed that the week i am in haiti, senatorial elections will be going on and that the city gets a bit rowdy. they cautioned me to be aware. some of that led to other fears and if i was doing the right thing. then yesterday i get an email from a close friend who has contacted some of his friends in haiti and they are going to meet me to show me their ministry and that stopped the fears. "strength will rise when we wait upon the Lord". thinking about last night i realized that God has laid His hand upon me and will not take it off. our j-team finished up the "crazy love" study series by francis chan. i think it brought out a lot in all of us. it makes me contemplate "what am i willing to give Him who gives me everything?" what is He worth to me? as chan ends the dvd study he shares the same hope that i have - that i will hear those words touching my soul,"well done".
can you imagine the incredible feeling with those words - well done. isn't that what we all so long for - someone to affirm us - to say well done. and to hear it from the One who gives us everything - i can only imagine.

a job that needs to be done

this mornings reading in "our daily bread" caught my attention. a recent "dirty jobs" segment with mike rowe had mike inside one of the support towers of the mackinac bridge in northern michigan. mike says to one of the painters, "there's no glory in what you do". the painter replies, "no, but it's a job that must be done". the story is that while probably no one knows what the painter does, his work serves to protect the interior of the bridge support towers so they don't corrode thereby compromising the integrity of the bridge. so many things in our lives go on without our knowledge, without even being noticed, but they are vitally important. sometimes it might just be in a smile to the person handing you your breakfast at a local fast food joint or that you speak kindly to the checkout clerk at walmart. whatever it is, it is our opportunity to give to others what Christ gives to us - faith, hope and love. and that is a job that needs to be done.

mixed emotions

it is scenes like this that bring such mixed emotions as i prepare to travel to haiti next month. most likely i will spend all of my time in the capital city of port-au-prince but the real poverty and devastation lie mainly north in the gonaives area.
last fall, four hurricanes battered the island and particularly this area with fierce winds, heavy rains, flooding and mudslides killing hundreds. the young girl that we support lives northwest of gonaives and i hardly have a clue what their living situation must be like. i hope to visit their home in my next trip. i have no presumptions as to what i can do but you don't know until you go.
what can i do and where do i start? what do you do when there appears to be no hope? i don't know the answers but you can't just do nothing. and maybe that is why my wife and i felt led to begin supporting this haitian child through compassion international in december 2007. so far, hope is hard to find in what i know about haiti and i am hoping that will change for me after this trip. my hope is that i can bring some hope to this family and together we can spread more hope in their community. my hope is to see what we can do to help their daily lives. possibly through this little girls education - she is six years old and just beginning to learn and have hope. maybe one day she will be able to go to college and come back to her community to bring more hope. that word hope is a big word and i am using it a bunch here. but hope and love are all we really have. and i think we must bring hope throughout the world one person at a time. i can not thank God enough - and don't - for the opportunity He presents me with. my hope is in Him.

scared kinda i don't know if anyone reads this

tonight is the second week our journey team has been in the "crazy love" study from the book by the same name by francis chan - that's him in the photo in case you were wondering who is that? i have really gotten in to the book, but tonight we hit chapter 4 titled "lukewarm" and it kinda scares me or maybe better put as making me uncomfortable. francis gets a bit in your face with some probing thoughts and questions. main question for me is a look inside myself and what is my temperature for God? it kinda scares me.... am i lukewarm? doesn't this incredible God deserve more than i am willing to give? i gotta look in the mirror and say truthfully, where am i in my relationship with God? is it just the stuff he gives me that measures my love for Him? what does it look like to be sold-out to Him?
i don't know if anyone reads this blog, but if you are reading this i encourage you to read this book. it will evoke inward thoughts and discussions about ourselves that we need to be asking. at the end of chapter 3 chan writes, "our love for Him always comes out of His love for us". so the real deal is do i really know and love God?

coming out of the dark

if you are reading this, you see how long it has been since i last posted. but as the allman brothers band sang in the song "wasted words"..."that was then, this is now. don't ask me to be mister clean 'cause baby i don't know how." that was then and then turned into darkness. now i feel like i am coming out of the dark. darkness can be lonely and difficult to understand. darkness is hard to navigate, hard to find your way out. it is hard to let people in when there is darkness surrounding you. darkness can be perception only with virtually no reality and darkness can be very real. so what do you do when darkness closes in? seek help? where? can you let go? as james taylor sings..."i've seen fire and i've seen rain. i've seen sunny days that i thought would never end. i've seen lonely times when i could not find a friend. but i always thought i'd see you... one more time again." who is you? your best friend, your spouse? God, Jesus Christ? if today was your last day on earth, who would you want to see just one more time again? peace